WHEN FRIENDS ARE BAD COMPANY...
I cannot stress this enough: You carry the energy that you have allowed others to transfer to you.
Before I venture off to the main point of this blog post I want to start of writing about what happened to me recently.
A few weeks ago when it was towards the end of my shift at work everyone was in their little groups talking, me being me naturally moved on to the group where the topic was on boys. As a girl that I was friendly with walked past, the group I was in started making very negative comments concerning her weight and what she was wearing.
From where we stood, the girl could see how the girls were laughing in gest of her and I am sure she heard some of the remarks. It took me a slow second to realise what was happening and I stepped away from the group and found someone else to talk to, but by then I had made eye contact with the girl and from the look she gave me I could tell she thought I was one of them.
Words couldn't describe how bad I felt. Even though technically I hadn't done anything wrong, who I was seen with had automatically made me guilty by association.
Thank God that a few days after, I saw the girl again and I was able to explain myself to her to clear my conscience. Not everyone gets the opportunity to do so because as humans, we love to classify and put things in boxes, so a lot of the times you only get one chance to prove your worth.
I'd originally had a different topic I wanted to talk about this month but after watching part of a sermon on TBN on reputation, everything just aligned and I knew I had to write on this.
We as humans build credibility by the relationships we are tied to. It's our natural habit to have a habitat that says we belong somewhere, that there are people who can verify our worth. This is why employers ask for references from previous employers, why being the mother-in-law to Leo Tolstoy's great-grandson sounds much cooler than being the sister to the office cleaner. (Not like there is anything wrong with being an office cleaner, if that is a job you love, it was just a point of comparison.)
I believe there are two things (other than God's divine appointment) that will make anyone achieve their dreams in life and that is a) working hard b)being surrounded with people who mentally, emotionally and spiritually stimulate you to grow the best you can be as a human being.
And taking a break from the wise book of Proverbs 13:20, it says, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.”
In time to write this blog post I have just finished reading James Altucher's incredible, soul-satiating, life-revolutionalising and best-selling book, “Choose Yourself”, where he alikens our bodies to a house that has four separate departments and that is the physical, emotional, spiritual and mental and our life's aim should be to protect and prosper those parts much like how Proverbs 4:23 says we should, “Above all else, guard your hearts from out of it flows the issues of life.”
Now what Altucher also reiterates in his book is that, which is a wonderful point he makes, “People become crappy people not because of who they are, but because they are crapping inside of you.”
And in no point in time we should be allowing that to happen.
When we are in a place where peer pressure is felt we should be confident that our 'house' is strong enough, meaning our values and morals are not compromised in order to please the crowd.
With that said, we need to do what Ephesians 5:1-2 tells us to do: Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love...”
It's hard for a giraffe to be an ant, but it's damn right easy, as the most adaptable species on the planet, for a human to act the snake or the goat when bad company is around.
- Efé's Thought for The Month: My Body is Not A Canvas
- Eféctive Guest Post by @MissRuthElias: In the Face of Pain and Anguish Of Healing